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Posts Tagged ‘worry’

thank you for walking under the cherry blossoms with me
and talking to me as i cried afterward

the day before radka lisa day was a rough one
and a beautiful one

when i am able to walk down streets of english-style houses
and not worry about everything, i want to be walking with you

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She clicked on the radio, and it wasn’t there.  She waited.  She waited for the one that would finally tell them about  her lovers since November, those moments of panic that rose while he slept with her hand on his stomach, that morning when a thunderstorm flew into the country and blew a gust across the sheets and scattered her lists and movie stubs  across the desk and carpeted floor.

She clicked off the radio and opened the desk drawer too far. It clacked against the bones of her knees. She felt it in her spine. The photos and pens and sticky notes were all in their places and as the sun was going down, she clicked on the lamp beside her bed. Waiting out those glimpses of fear, hoping the lamp would help, turning it off again to feel it swell in her belly.

She built up the pillows against her sides, but her neck was twisted and shoulders tight.  The hum of the fan recounted weight sharing, the fall day when the milk was returned to the pantry and the cereal to  the fridge, smooth skin, wetness on her cheeks, a voice’s hoarse laugh after 7 hours of singing in a silver Toyota, remembering she’s forgotten to miss her.  Her body could not fit any better here, but she couldn’t sleep without them knowing all of this.

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